My Ancestry Story

Since I moved to Hamilton a surprising amount of strangers have asked me the question
"Where are you from?"
This was a question I answered all the time when I was abroad , being asked in my home city is kind of funny. Aaron says it's just because I still have a small town-esque disposition but I'm sure they're just captivated by my beauty...

Anyways I always give people the same answer; I was born here but my Mother was born in Jamaica and my Father in England. I'm a first generation child!
My parent's heritages have always been something I'm proud to share and learn more about. My Mother tells the most bright and fantastic stories from her upbringing. My Father's a baby boomer who immigrated with his Mom at a young and doesn't have many stories from adolescents in England. I always just imagine him with an accent as he spoke of the days he can recall.

Through out the 60's and 70's my Mom grew up in rural township in Montego Bay. Her Father was a farmer/business man and her Mother a strong house lady. Her childhood stories involve waterfall adventures, the elders that came by and did business with her Father, her Mothers record collection and beating up bullies for her sister. She comes from a large family of 11 brothers and sister and a small livelihood.

My Father was born in Sussex England in the 50's and immigrated to Canada when he was 11. Him and my Grandmother came over by boat and his oldest sister stayed and raised her family in England. My father only knew his Father's name and that he was born in India. As far as he knew he died before the war and if my grandmother had married him our last names would have been Jolly! (that always amused me)

It was Aarons idea to buy the Ancestry DNA tests, I just thought I knew enough about my heritage to answer the questions of strangers so that's probably all I'll ever need to know. My first experience with Ancestry was when I met my cousin in Australia who had been adopted out of my family. Using Ancestry she was able to find her birth Mother (my Dads older sister) and the rest of her siblings. Now on my own ancestry journey, I was connected with another cousin who is related to me by a brother my Dad never knew he had from his Father who he also never met.

I sent my Dad the pictures of his father and his brother immediately. I would describe his joyousness as that of a kid who opens their first kinder egg! He found out about his fathers business importing and exporting goods from China to England. Which is so coincidently similar to his own business, shipping goods to the Caribbean. Talk about destiny!

My grandfather passed away in 1983 at the age of 77. My father now in his 72nd year of life has finally "met" his father.

If you are thinking about getting yourself or someone else an Ancestry DNA test I strongly recommended. It's simple and quick and you may just find someone across the world who shares a little piece of your life.

Living My Breast Life

Julius is now three months and a week old, which means I have about 1,363 more days before I can expect to get a full nights sleep. The weeks feel like long days broken up by short naps. Some days by the time Aaron comes home from work and asks how our day was the highlight is either the things I did while Julius napped or on one of those extra special days.. we both had a nice long nap.

The best advice I get from other moms or other parents is "enjoy every stage , they go by so fast". Now I understand how time can be pulled from right under my nose. (Or should I say my pillow) Three months ago I was anticipating all the things I'd be able to do when I was "finished being pregnant" as I'd say. The clothes I'd fit back into, the comfy positions I'd sleep in , the ease of getting in and out of my car. HAHAHA.

Finished being pregnant aka now carrying babe on the outside. Clothing options were still maternity wear for awhile because they were also breastfeeding accessible. Comfy sleeping positions? My new fav is what I call The Relaxed Farm Animal. It's when my baby is feeding from me and I curl around him with a half awake but peaceful facial expression. And of course if I thought getting in and out of a vehicle being 20lbs heavier was tough.. at least that was hands free. This chunky monkey weighs 18 lbs now. When I pick him up in the carseat I practically need to chalk my hands and refuel my electrolytes.

I could write a book on The Things I Thought Would Be Easier, After a Certain Point in Life. (hay I'm not the only one with that novel title on stand by right?!) Until then here are my Top Three Tips to Living the Breast Life aka three things most new Mommies (and even Daddies) should do while adjusting to life at home with a new baby.

#1. Get up and get ready every day. NO MATTER HOW TIRED. Or how much forecasted vomit will ruin the outfit . Do it and thank me later. This is something I just started doing and it has changed my life. Usually I'd use that last part of that sentence to express exaggeration but I am being more accurate than the last meme you saw. It clicked for me one day when I was looking in the mirror with Julius (he loves to do this) and I resembled a starving racoon. There was some stain on my shirt that couldn't be identified as mine or Julius'. My armpits were an interesting fragrance of au de cheveux and Julius was wearing a brand new onesie looking like poster child for My Mom Needs an Extreme Make Over. I could almost hear our reflection whisper "MOVE THAT BUSS". We now have a casual morning routine. Wake up, stretch /play, change diaper , make bed , and then I get ready in an outfit that makes me feel comfy and cute. That includes a house coat or grey track pants with a xxl gym shirt BUT I will choose a matching set of unders to add the cute element.

OK NEXT.

#2. At least one daytime nap a day. I have been exceeding the limit this week which has had a bit of a reverse affect. I'm usually a busy busy busy body, getting the dishes done, dinner prep, laundry, groceries, just out and about or crafting. It may just be day light savings that messed me up a bit this week but anyways.  Usually while baby is napping it is the perfect time to get something done. And like I said before on those extra special days I nap too. Now he is napping less or shorter and I realized I am going to miss those 2 hour windows of "freedom". So to day light save on naps I found out what things I'd do while he's sleeping that I can still do while he's awake if I wear him in a sling. That is a win win, because stuff can get done and he's staying interested during his awake time. Without the day nap I noticed myself feeling very irritable and emotional,  I know it was from a lack of sleep so the daytime nap tip was my first remedy choice and it helped a lot.

THANK YOU, NEXT

#3. I'm so f***king great full for being able to multitask BUT my last (definitely not least) tip is ONLY MULTI TASK IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE A SUPER WOMAN (in a giggly way) aka don't be afraid to ask for help. I've had to breastfeed and use the little mommies room at the same time. I couldn't help but laugh cause both Julius and I just needed to do what we needed to do. I found the right holding position for him, slowly assumed my position and then in the wise words of Missy Elliott flipped it and reversed it. On the contrary there are times when Julius has released a monstrosity of a bowel movement just as the oven timer is going off, the kids are fighting downstairs, Aaron is outside working on our cars and I just want to cry. I know help isn't always there exactly when you need it but when it is , appreciate even the littlest tiny bit of it and use it to calm down or get ahead of laundry or go get a coffee and a donut.

*que lights and game show winner music*

A BONUS TIP. Because 5-10 times a day baby needs you to do one of the most important mum duties ...
#3.5 Make diaper changes fun. I get some of the most memorable smiles from Julius when I lay him down to change a big dirty diaper. When it's all clean I like to give him a minute of un diapered freedom. (*warning* this can be dangerous , expect anything) I blow on his belly to make an obnoxious fart sound and I'll sing a song to his toes about piggies going to markets. It makes the experience stink a lot less for both of us.

I hope everyone who has one is enjoying march break and babies!!

peace , love, and baby cries

But First, SELFIE.

I remember crying my hardest temper tantrum cry on Christmas Day (when I was about 6 years old by the way) after my sisters and cousins all got brand new, sleek, silver , flip phones. If I were to give any kids today one of those devices they'd probably ask what it does.

We used to stay up till one or two am to play Sims and Rollercoaster Tycoon. And don't even get me started with MSN messenger memories... The Much Music Countdown was our Spotify and my sister would record our favourite music videos on a VHS tape. These are sacred pre youtube-istoric memories. What fun shenanigans would connect your friends and family without a wifi password? 

So there is a playground near my house that can connect to an app and be more interactive. More interactive? Then being away from screens and causing a ruckus at the park? There's also a very cool but tangley rope climbing apparatus, which I wouldn't recommend accepting a challenge from a 5 yr old on. There's a nice balance between tech and play, I was just shocked to see a tablet and cellphone friendly playground. So of course I had to go to Instagram about it. 

In my at home playground equipped with free time crafting and new breastfeeding positions, I'm really trying to balance my tech use as well. Some days I think about starting a youtube channel. Another day I realize I've spent all my screen time shoe shopping. Then there's the dreaded but necessary evil of online schooling. The amount of time I spend online didn't really bother me until recently I noticed Julius had what I call The Screen Stare.

Have you ever seen a kid with their tablet or in front of the tv totally zoned out. Or that someone walking almost into you on the sidewalk. Drivers at red lights and pedestrians crossing the street. And I'm totally guilty! Id rather let the kids watch an episode of something before dinner than wrangle them up from all over the house when foods ready. I think I must take at least 150 selfies of me and Julius an hour... 

(I read a fact yesterday that the average person will take 25,000 selfies in their lifetime. WHATTT. I actually thought it'd be more)

There was this extremely eerie youtube virus recently that just made my family stop and say woah, we need to get out of wifi reach, turn off data and spend some time in the real world. The virtual reality goes everywhere with us though. The minute something cute happens I can't pull out my phone fast enough to share the moment on my socials. These things just begged me to question, could I go a day without my phone? Or without any of the screens in my home. 

I really don't think I could and my excuse is I need to keep my phone on incase babe calls me from work. 

*que awes and romantic background music*

Through socials I get inspired and stay connected, but sometimes the amount of content consumed a day feels like I've viewed all pages of an A-Z encyclopedia set. There's a lot out there so please be mindful of what you're putting out and taking in. Of course I'll always be a source of positivity and a little creativity  :) 

Ps. let me know in comments or in a personal message somewhere if you'd tune into me and the fam on a youtube channel and what type of stuff you'd like to see.

Stay wavy.