No Time to Get Down Cause I’m Moving Up

Yesterday my manager introduced us all to the new guy coming to replace me at my job!! First thing. HE’S SO CUTE. He’s tall and wears fashionable glasses. Second. I’M SO SAD TO LEAVE  I LOVE EVERYONE.

This week I’ve felt myself slip from a physically and emotional “wowie” week to a “wow” week. Translated from Latin Raisian dialect to English that means thing have been just soaring, flying, it felt like there wasn’t a star in heaven that I couldn’t reach . To oh wait there it is the star damn. AM I MAKING SENSE.. NO.. OK. So my last day at my job is Sunday then I leave for the road trip Thursday. It’s like YAY but it’s also like haaaayyyy . I’m going to really really miss these people! All sad and said it won’t be the last time I see them ever. I’ll be back in Sydney for a little while  after the road trip.

I just get all emotional when it comes to changes. Not like “ I wanna watch sad movies and eat 14 litres of ice cream” emotional but like “I’m gonna nap, listen to sad songs, interpretative dance and cry”. I’m basically a well rested mess. This rut will usually last as long as a day or a week.  I know mental health week passed recently and I haven’t shared internetly anything about mental illness in my life. Mental illness runs in my family immediate and generationally  and I tend to put these melancholy times under a microscope. It’s important to take the time to acknowledge and evaluate internally before moving on. I realize these days come and don’t last forever and remind myself overall my life is good so interpretive dance for the greater good no fears no tears. Just me and my weird body moments!

I’ve been in the middle of my families bullshit. It’s inevitable. I thought of Oz as my one way ticket to freedom. To take the flower blooming in a dark room and trust it.  Being here made me realize that shit wasn’t just external and I couldn’t just find poetic justice so easily. It’s internal, It’s my being , weather I can fully admit it yet or not, It’s me. I cringe a little every time I do something or say something exactly like my parents. It’s really so weird sometimes. I thought once I was away from “everyone else’s problems” that things would less complicated ...  could I sound any more naive ?

Anyways I’ve learned I have a lot to deal with within my self. One way I’ve always done this is just being very open with people. When I’m stressed about  some thing I have people to talk to and I do .When I feel something stressing me that isn’t tangible it feels impossible to articulate, even to myself.

Yesterday was blah and I’m glad I have my room mates around. Today has been YAH and I'm even more glad. I’m gonna miss every one I’ve fallen in love with!!!!!

During the road trip I’m going to be like boom boom, driving, yaa yaa, wine in a box, ukulele , camp fires, woah where are we, I love this song! WE MADE IT. Sooo I’m going to post more poetry than lengthy writings. Some poems from the archives, when times are hectic and of course poetic synopses of our caravan crusade.  

 IM EXCITED AND SAD AND THIS IS LIFE. It’s wowie and its wow. If you take nothing else from this I leave with these words:

Eat ice cream for breakfast, ask people about their ulcers, stare wondrously at tall boys, get a pedicure and dance naked.  Fill yourself with pure love where ever and whenever. Because it’s the one thing we always need no matter where life takes us.

Skating and Yoga: Chapter 1 - Raisha’s finds insight to the real world through this contrary couple.

This week I’ve been back on my skateboard for the first time since the first time.  Just casually.  I realized it’s virtually impossible to skate to and from work. It’s stressful enough to be a pedestrian in the city, trying to skate is like trying to rap a viscous Kendrick verse with little to no breaths and dab flawlessly in time for the bass drop . In the wise words of  RUN-DMC .... It’s tricky. So I just go around my area in the evening. I found this really great trail along the harbour it’s so nice!

I see these guys skating in Hyde Park almost every day now I do one of those cool and composed head nods to signal confirmation of their skatrobaticss .  jk lol I can barely walk in a straight line forget trying to not get run over and look like I know anything about skateboarding.

Inhale, change , exhale, cobra pose, inhale, jump or step forward to downward dog, exhale and hold downward dog. Feel your breath, let you head relax, hands closer together hun.

Saturday I attended my first ever yoga class!!  It was nice. I was late and sweaty, I missed stretches . When I got there we were starting a routine of breath, pose, breath, new pose etc. Starting very slowly, very calm, getting slightly faster and than doing it in almost one continues motion.

Honestly yoga felt very confidence restoring for me. I felt capable and calm and cool. Also the simplicity of strength is so under rated. Holding the downward dog whilst controlling breathing seems like forever. I’ve never like an orthodox work out. Sometimes I look at people jogging and want to throw donuts and couches. It’s like a subconscious self induced form of torture!! That’s just my very dramatic, very individual opinion. Anyways yoga is strengthening in terms of focus, relaxation and simple yet very involving movement.

Which got me contriving one of my maybe farfetched yet maybe exactly what the human race needs to be saved, theories.  SKATBOARDING AND YOGA ARE SO SIMILAR.

Think about it

Ah.. Uh huh. Yeaahhh. Okay so you’re with me.

Balance, focus, strength, confidence, homies,  %100 bitches will want you guarantee.

Goodness golly Raisha why so gang ster today. IT’S CALLED A REVELATION. I’m hyped up , flowing, kick push, I’m going, inhale exhale, yoga ing . word

Next Saturday hopefully I’m off and I can go again, who knows what kind of revolutionary cognitive, imaginative, connections will exude from my being as I inhale, kick, exhale , push through this week.

Until then, if you need to read something from the real world to bring yourself back to clarity. Options may include: the American election, vegan recipes or memes combining the two... Better yet sleep till next week and come back here!

Ps. T- minus 2 weeks until I leave for the road trip. Wow wow!!! AND IM TRYING TO BUY TICKETS TO SEESTICKY FINGERS OCT 28 ENMORE. PRAY FOR ME.

For the love of....LOVE

Lately, well actually always I'm thinking about love or loving people, places, things. I just made a bracelet that says "l.o.v.e"  chiya. It's that offical. Particularly since I've been in Oz there are some new loves in my life and I just want to give them some blog love so here I go (in no particular order)

1. feta cheese
2. cornflakes
3.olives
4. pigeons
5. people running
6. when you lock eyes with someone and than both instantly look away
7.touching or high-fiving leaves
8. fashion
9. chicken on a stick
10. donut time
11. cinnamon
12. my co workers
13. de-cafe coffee
14. soya sauce
15. sushi
16. putlocker.is
17. Australians saying "water or art or reckon or ta or how ya going"
18. meeting someone from north america
19. when someone says something about my "accent"
20. grocery shopping
21. peanut butter
22. my ankles
23. the way people panic when it rains
24. the pause between the time the walking light turns green and the first step
....


Oh I knoooww my life is so exciting!! I dont think simple is a bad word. I also think I am easily pleased. Yesterday my roommate and I did the Bondi to Coogee walk , I helped her with her pronunciation of some words! ( she's from France) and she helped me with some French! It was soo funny because for at least a half hour we were singing "drop it like it hawwtttt" and with her frenchy-ness it was honestly the funniest thing. The mind can become so over workerd with worldly problems and responsiblilities. These little things keep me light.  It might be intersting to come up with your own little list!

Stop! Drop! ROAD TRIP!!

Today marks 5 months since I've been in Sydney. A lot has happened . Mostly inwardly . But today also marks 30 days till me, my roommate and a couple friends embark on a month long road trip! Yes you heard it here first folks. 3-4 friends, one campervan and 30 days on the road. We are off to see the wizard, we are headed down the yellow brick road to Oz, preparing for take off, all system goes, one may even use the term lit .

Actually it's gonna be quite hectic! (In case you didn't notice I'm a seasoned aussie now)
I'm one of my last posts I mentioned doing farm work and getting another visa to stay here for another year.... well things change. Hearts break but wounds heal.

Jk there was no heart break involved but basically the job I thought I had fell threw and I thought WHHHAAATT AM I GONNA DOOOO and my lovely roommate said ROOAAADDD TRIIPPP.

And the rest is futurey.

I'm very very very excited for this! I was beginning to stress myself out a lot with finding a farm job and questioning wether it was what I really wanted and gaining weight and feeling blah and the fact that I am an aunty now. YES I'M AN AUNTY. 

 *side note*
I have always been the baby in my family. I have little to no experience with babies and  watching them grow or growing up with them! I take this Aunty thing as kind of an oath. Because I have insider experience being the baby in my family. For the love of all things that cry, poop themselves and are still irresistible, I must protect that child from the craziness that is my family x the world!!!

So yeah I'm an aunty and I want more than being in Australian a second year to be there for my nieces first birthday! I've also decided I want to learn French , do some sort of exchange and than maybe go to university!

Every person I meet, when I saw "I'm from Canada" they say "Oh cool so you speak French" than I say "we, le chat, jaune, undo twat, j maple Raisha" .

Things change. hearts break. wounds heal. Evanescence writes a song, I sang it to the general practitioner when I got my ankle checked out. He didn't get the reference. Life goes on.

Life goes on! And for this newly pudgy, happiness pursing , no longer teenager me goes on, I feel I am blooming .